What a frightening thing is the human,
a mass of gauges and dials and registers
and we can read only a few
and those perhaps not accurately. - John Steinbeck

- beautifully broken

What am I to you?

Lather-

Rinse-

Repeat, Right?

a Ziploc bag and air tight
container,

an old discarded book,

yard sale worthy

and deliberately blinded,

a real thrift store glory.

do i mean anything to You-

or is it all just a game?

am i simply your prize

at the end of this maze?

they will cheer

and You will holler,

while i sit in the corner

silently dazed.

Oh, you're forgetting
something-

Repeat

Repeat

Repeat

right?

- beautifully broken

The In-Between

From my journal.
July 1st, 2010

Hello there. Welcome to a not-so fabulous time in my life. Most people call it summer. For me it's the in-between. Neither this not that.

From my journal.
July 4th, 2010

I'm flying over Washington right now, up into a sky that from below looked so dull. One flat layer of white marshmallow fluff. This is wonder un-equalled by anything else. As I look over this expanse of mystery, I think of another mystery. I think about you- you are somewhere below in the land that I am seeing from above. Minding your own business, not thinking about me. I'm sure. And I realize that you're not so different from the clouds out my window. Depending on where I look at them, the clouds invoke very different feelings inside of me. And with you- I can either see you as a possibility or an almost. Each feels different, but with you... Neither seem to hurt. I am simply content. Gosh, you're somewhere down there. You're minding your own business. Not thinking about me, I'm sure.

From my journal.
July 5th, 2010

I don't want to talk about it.

- Beautifully Broken

. Thorns .

For once I want to be the car crash

Not always just the traffic jam
Hit me hard enough to wake me

Headlights... before me
So beautiful, so clear
Reach out... and take it
Cos I'm so tired of all this fear

My tongue is lost, oh, I can't tell you
Please just see it in my eyes
I pull up thorns from our ripped bodies
And let the blood fall in my mouth

For once I want to be the car crash

Not always just the traffic jam

- beautifully broken

< Before and After >

A photo before edits on Picnik.com-

And the image after-

What aspects of the edits do you like in the final piece?
Are there things you could do without?


-Beautifully Broken

a striking resemblance

In may of 2007 I wrote:

...you can't break me, I'm already broken...

. . . and dying eyes consume me now,
the voice inside me screams out loud . . .

(((And just like all the others you will leave me. And once again ill be left broken hearted and alone.)))

<<<<<<<<<<<< You always get a second chance to make a first impression so make it count and do it right because third chances are hard to come by>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

" I just want to go back to believing in everything and knowing nothing at all "

Save me from this cloud above me.
Take me back to happy endings
and i will do the same to you.
Wipe away your tears,
read between the lines.
Please let us talk the whole night away
Addicted to your words.
So, don´t you say good bye.

_______I miss you. A lot._______

Now, ask me how much has changed. Because honestly, it feels like the same old shit all over again. The breaking, I mean. How do I do it? Come full circle every time. Repeat the same pattern, time and time again. My pattern. My fault. End of story-


- Just Broken,
forget the beautiful